Dads in the Limelight – Financial Planner, Benjamin Eichler
Our 650th Dad in the Limelight is Financial Planner, Benjamin Eichler of Whippletree Financial. I want to thank Benjamin Eichler for being a part of this series. It has been great getting connected with him and now sharing Benjamin Eichler with all of you.
1)Tell me about yourself.
I’m 42, a father of two and husband of one. My wife and I have been together since August of 2000. I have a Master’s degree in Business from Michigan State University and own my own business. For fun, I enjoy camping, volunteering for local service organizations, and spending quantity time with my family.
2) Tell me about your family.
My wife has been managing small businesses since she was 17, and now works with me. She’s my best friend. My daughter, my oldest, is nearly 12 and finishing the 6th grade. She’s applying for courses at MSU to supplement Junior High next year. She’s extremely independent, with a strong work ethic that’s helped her excel in school and athletics. My son, my youngest, is 9 and finishing the third grade. He’s a bundle of pure joy who always seeks to entertain.
3) What has been the largest challenge you have had in being a father?
Responsibility. When you’re single, you can come and go as you please. But, as a husband and a father, other people’s opinions have to be taken into consideration. You have roommates. They have needs and wants. Sometimes they need attention when I want to be alone. They create bills that my work has to cover.
4) What advice would you give to other fathers?
Ignore the unsolicited advice from other parents until you’ve met your own kids. Each child is different and there’s no blanket advice that covers everything. I’ve spent most of the last 12 years moving through phases that start and end without warning. Each new phase brings relief and challenges, and it feels like you’re continually moving down a row of padlocks cracking the combination of one after another. Understand that once you’ve found a solution, it’s unlikely to work for others. Don’t give unsolicited advice to new fathers.
Don’t live vicariously through your kids.
The decision to become a parent is equal to choosing marriage or a tattoo. I made my decisions because I wanted to. These decisions are permanent. I try my hardest not to recommend or discourage anyone to make the same commitments I’ve made.
Keep a running list (in a journal or otherwise) of sentences that come out of your mouth that no sane person would ever expect. (ie. “why did you paint yourself with cheese?”)
5) How have you come to balance parenthood and outside life?
I’ll let you know when I’ve reached a balance. I keep trying to work my schedule so that I time-block everything. I think it makes me more efficient. I think it’s improved my ability to stay on task. I also try to train my clients and manage their expectations for when I’ll be available to them. My family understands that I will make to every activity possible, but sacrifices may need to be made on the other days. However, I continually struggle with focusing on work when I’m at work and being home when I’m home. The two areas continually bleed into each other and I get distracted far more often than I would care to admit.
6) What have you learned from the fathers that you have interacted with?
We’re all just winging it, trying to do the best we can. No one has everything under control at all times. Sometimes there’s great joy and moments you share proudly. Sometimes the diaper’s capacity is exceeded in the middle of a formal event.
7) What else would you share regarding your experiences as a father thus far?
I love it. I know what it’s like to love someone unconditionally. I know what it’s like to genuinely enjoy watching someone else succeed. I also know what it’s like to share in someone else’s hard work, defeat, and humiliation. I know what it’s like to have to be the rock that others depend on, even when I’m scared and exhausted too.
8) What have been the most memorable experiences that you have had thus far as a parent?
Cuddle-time. Smooches on the belly. Performing first-aid. Waking in the middle of the night to the sound of vomiting. Wiping tears. Watching them ride a two-wheeler after proclaiming that they can’t. Constantly teaching and explaining. Sharing what I know about the world. Listening to them read to me.
If you have any questions for Benjamin Eichler, please leave a comment here and I will make sure that he gets them so that he may be able to respond!
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